'I don't want to change anything about him.
I love Amit for what he is'

Jaya Bachchan

Traditionally, I think the 60th year is a very important stage in one's life. After 60, one's mindset changes. Amit has always been in a different mould. His concerns today and always are his parents and children. I agree with that.

I don't think Amit has been influenced solely by anybody. I think his father has been his main inspiration.

His one outstanding quality is his patience. He is really a recluse, an introvert. I would define him as a very conscientious and good human being.

This book, To Be Or Not To Be, is a birthday gift for him. The family often gives each other books on special occasions, on birthdays. We all love books.

The book has been written by Khalid Mohamed. I have written my bit, as has the family. I have written the foreword. My focus was the man. His professional side was dealt with by Khalid, and the personal side by us, the family members.

Amit reacts like an excited child if you give him a thoughtful gift. It is not very easy to give him a gift. I don't think materialistic things are important, but he enjoys thoughtful gifts.

It is a pity people have not really exploited Amit's talent as much as they should have. He is capable of a lot more. His father [Dr Harivansh Rai Bachchan] wants to see him do Beckett and Hamlet.

I have often been asked what life is like as a superstar's wife. I don't know how to answer that because, to me, he is a husband, and has never been anything but normal --- as a man and father.

I don't know how superstars are supposed to behave, but he is very normal.

He is a lot more normal than many people. And it is very important that he has kept it that way, being head of the family. He has a very basic, very down-to-earth style of living. That is how he has taught the family to live.

He rarely gets angry, but insincerity, irresponsibility make him angry. He dislikes anything that is ugly. It could be a bedsheet, it could be the way someone is dressed. That can put him in a bad mood. And he doesn't even know what put him off till he thinks about it and realises, 'Oh I saw this awful colour somewhere and it put me in a bad mood.'

Amit is not a foodie. He can't be bothered making decisions about mundane things like food. He finds it difficult to go to a buffet and decide what he should eat. He basically thinks it is a big bore.

He can't take decisions easily and quickly. I have often wished he could because I am completely different. We never make decisions for each other. If it is a decision regarding the family, we sit down together and decide together. But individually, we take our own decisions.

I think success has come from giving each other a lot of space to grow, function, and not stifle or control each other's style, thinking, or living. Even when he was busy I was never lonely. We have been a very self-sufficient family. We maintain good contact.

I have never been alone. Whenever there has been something that has bothered me or the children, we have always gone back to each other rather than to anyone else.

I am not a very ambitious person for myself, but for my husband and children, I am. For him I want rest, less stress, because when he is relaxed and when he has no strain, it is a pleasure being with him. Then he is a wonderful, wonderful person to be with. He is so gentle.

Every wife wishes that her husband was less busy. But I don't want him sitting at home telling me what to cook. I do definitely want him more at home to spend more time with me, with the children.

He is older now and not as fit, but he hasn't really changed.

Would I like to change anything about him? No. I am quite happy with the way he is. I love him the way he is.

Jaya Bachchan spoke to Lata Khubchandani